No One Has Ever Been Able To Make a Decent Tasting INSTANT Coffee!

Maybe they could try using Stem Cells

Mikeys Numbers, Statistics Rule

1. number of poets making a living from their poetry - 10, since the beginning of time.
2. number of hustlers making $ giving poets false hope and schemes - this week, 439.
3. number of truly altruistic acts in the month of December (avg) any year - 14, including 6 by the almighty and 4 by people who didn't realize what they were doing.
4. number of nuns across the world who secretly danced in their cubicle, before the Beatles, - 12
5. number afterwards - 6703, excluding those who were only able to tap their feet
6. average number of bricks in a 10 story building, 378000.
7. average number in a looting event - one.
8. avg number of times that a harried mother ignores her child saying "mom, mom, MOM!"before acknowledging 15.
9. number of times the acknowledgement is followed by the phrase "no need to yell" - every time
10. average number of times a waitperson enters the "no" door on a slow night -12.
11. average number of times a waitperson enters the wrong door to the kitchen on a busy shift - one
12. number of times the phrase "what goes around, comes around" on a daily average in USA - 2,900,000
13. number of times that it actually comes around - 41.

Nostradamus - Couldn't He See It Coming?

Overrated Genius Candidate #2.

Mark Twain/Samuel Clemens*. Notice that the big floppy mustache motif continues. One of the most read and respected American Writers of all time, famous even in his lifetime He was at times a cranky disorganized geezer, writer, and thinker. His editors should get half the credit. He wrote criticisms of contemporaries such as Jane Austen, James Fenimore Cooper, and George Eliot, for $ of course, in the "tooth and claw" style of literary criticism that he invented. He also invented the "Albert Einstein Look". 
*He is not known to have murdered anyone and he had many honorable qualities. He reportedly combed his hair with a spoon.

the Bell Curve

Just think how stupid the average person is, then realize that half of them are even stupider!' --George Carlin

Most Overrated Geniuses (or Geniui) of All Time

Candidate 1: Johannes Kepler, astronomer, physicist, mathematician and MURDERER? The guy on the right may have been poisoned by JoJo, who may have wanted to steal his mentor's data. Investigation is currently underway. Both these guys are creepy looking. If mustaches could kill, they'd both be dead.

Today's Best Internet Tip ...

Don't Forget - Gravity is ALWAYS On!