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Everybody's a Comedian

2. Experimental Philosophy adds clarity to murkiness, and brews Beer of Truth.

scientists make lousy metaphors, referring to umbilical cords and kitchen sponges, then non-sponge all in reference to the same cosmic phenomenon.  Puhlease!  We tossed the question to a group of experimental philosophers to see what they could come up after experimenting for an afternoon.

Experimental Philosophers Data:  Cosmic Frog Eggs 17%, Cherry Pie Filling 22%, Cosmic Candy Buttons 4%, Natural Sponge Marks 0%, Cosmic Bokeh 43% Astronomical Scabies 45%, One of Six Star Trek Episodes where they Run into this kind of Goo 80%.  As scientists we didn't just come with an answer to the question, we came up with Data that goes all round the question with no definite conclusion.  Knube said "Now that's real science!"
Note that numbers do not add to 100 percent.  We haven't a fuckin clue why, we're philosophers for Christ sake. 

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Experimental Philsophy Results Postponed Temporarily

Father of Experimental Philosophy Tackles Cosmic Mysteries - Umbilical Cord My ASS

"The notion of the Milky Way being fed by a cosmic array of star clusters working like an "umbilical cord"strikes me as strange.  Plus you got this sponge, non-sponge weirdness going on.  I'm skeptical so's I gathered researchers to work on the problem.  The protocol was to get together some experimental philosophers that I know from work and from the club, and have them test the theories and bs-itrons flying around, and see if they have a better answer".  Surprising results published in next post.

JJ Knube (ka-noob), father of Experimental Philosophy

A Demonstration of the Usefulness of Experimental Philosophy.1. "The filament of star clusters and small galaxies around the Milky Way is like the umbilical cord that fed our galaxy during its youth."

"What we have discovered is evidence for the cosmic thread that connects us to the vast expanse of the universe," says Dr Stefan Keller of the Research School of Astronomy and Astrophysics at ANU.

Australians to Blame for this one

ordinary matter is driven, like foam on the crest of a wave, into vast interconnected sheets and filaments stretched over enormous cosmic voids – "much like the structure of a kitchen sponge."
"Unlike a sponge, however, gravity draws the material .blah blah blah...more wacko scientist metaphors."  JK Knube sez "we'll see if we can clean this mess up."